


Ten Minutes In The Life Of Sam Winchester And His Dumb Husband

by a_fandom_affliction



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Ficlet, Fluff, Gabriel is a Little Shit, Lawyer Sam, M/M, Married Couple, Plucky Pennywhistle's Magical Menagerie, Sam Is So Done, Teacher Gabriel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-04
Updated: 2016-08-04
Packaged: 2018-07-29 07:56:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7676404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a_fandom_affliction/pseuds/a_fandom_affliction
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pinball machines, fibs, suspicious Sam, and unstoppable laughter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ten Minutes In The Life Of Sam Winchester And His Dumb Husband

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is a distraction from my other fic. (He's Kinda Cute, But Mostly Concerning. Which, by the way, is seriously gonna get updated. Please stick with me!) I hope you like this... weird thing. This weird, fluffy thing. This fluffy thing with Gabriel and Sam. I don't know.

 

“Where are you?” Sam asks, one eyebrow raising as he props his phone between his ear and shoulder. There are some suspicious sounds coming from Gabriel’s end of the call, though that may be just because he works at an elementary school.

 

“Work,” is Gabriel’s clipped answer, and, yeah, that’s suspicious. Sam sets down the file he was leafing through, and leans back in his desk chair. Normally, Gabriel goes on and on about his students, and how awesome they are. Not talking about them means that a) Sam’s husband has been replaced by a clone, b) Sam’s husband is lying, or c) Sam’s husband is really, really, deathly sick. 

 

Considering that Gabriel can’t even handle a cold without proclaiming that he’s dying, Sam sincerely doubts that the answer is option C. And, since, obviously, choice A is impossible, Sam is left with only one conclusion.

 

And he’d bet his life savings that he knows _exactly_ where Gabriel is.

 

“Oh, good,” he says, nonchalantly. “I thought that maybe you were at Plucky Pennywhistle’s. Again.” Sam shifts the phone to his other ear, and looks at the ceiling. He can practically hear Gabriel’s mind struggling to come up with a decent thing to say.

 

“That’s ridiculous, Sammy,” Gabriel scoffs after a few seconds. Sam closes his eyes as a pinball machine goes off in the background.

 

“Ridiculous?” Sam does his best to not laugh. “Ohhhhhkay.”

 

“It would’ve been fine if you just believed me,” Gabriel whines, bursting into giggles. “You never would have known! Why don’t you trust me?”

 

“Because you touch yourself at night,” Sam says calmly, finally managing to force back his laughter. Gabriel’s indignant splutter nearly sends him over the edge, though, and he quickly hangs up.

 

Sam slumps at his desk, laughing into his hands as his phone beeps with one new text message after another.

 

        **u will pay**

 

**that was rood dood**

 

**im offended????**

 

**like that was a month ago gtf over it sam its juts jerking off**

 

**its a natural process**

 

**sam???**

 

**saM IM TRYINg tO BE MA D aT Y O U**

 

**ur a child**

 

**grow up & touch urself**

 

**wait don’t grow up anymore try growing down instead**

 

**but touch urself ok**

 

**sammmmm**

 

**sam you cant just say that and hang up**

 

**r u ded**

 

**i mean dead**

 

**im going to marry plucky pennywhistle and have magic clown babies**

 

**saAm**

 

**#mature**

 

**i bet ur laughing rn**

 

**when u get home im going to put antlers to your head**

 

**or OR ill glue the furniture to the walls again**

 

**but this time**

 

**it will be unfixable**

 

**SAM UU BIT C H**

 

**ANSWE R**

 

**what if i died like rite now tho**

 

**what wud u do**

 

**wud u stop laughing to morn**

 

**i mean mourn**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**sam**

 

**im divorcing u**

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> ahhhhghghggghghghghghghgh welcome to trash can land
> 
> Please leave comments and kudos!


End file.
